2017

1
Stories from The Whiner: Adult Defiance
2
#Blogpaws Diary – Final Post
3
Sherlock Herms Purranormal Mysteries One Year Anniversary!
4
A Sherlock Herms Flashback: The Case of Mrs. Shallowford’s Ghost
5
Stories from The Whiner: Monkey Toss
6
Dori’s Command Performance: Purrple Underpants
7
Herman @TattleCat’s #Blogpaws Diary Day Two
8
Herman @TattleCat’s #Blogpaws Diary Day One
9
Mockingbird Mother’s Day
10
Sherlock Herms Has Gone to #Blogpaws

Stories from The Whiner: Adult Defiance

Hi, it’s me, Dori *wavy paws* with another Story from The Whiner, a newsletter my mom used to write about her fish-out-of-water experiences of being a girl from the suburbs living in the country. Apparently there is a trick to doing it…and my parents were both severely clueless.

In this episode my Mom, Kimberley Koz, proves it is indeed possible to Age Without Brains. And now…Adult Defiance. Read More

#Blogpaws Diary – Final Post

Hi Furends! Well, I’m home after a long week in Myrtle Beach, SC, attending the Blogpaws conference. Sorry I didn’t post more stuff while at the conference, but the pace is fast, and my Mom had back trouble that put her in a massage therapist hands for an hour…and I was a bit of a crabby puss cuz… Cat. So writing in my diary every night turned impossible. But I’m here now to do a recap of what went on for those of you not there.

To begin with, me and Mom had a great time hanging out with the pawrents of @BionicBasil, @ErintheCat1, @TheLittle_Dude, @MKandHerBC, @ChirpyCats, @Lola_RescuedCat, @SnotfaceCritter, @NoirKittyMews, and making new friends to see again next year in Kansas City.

I especially had a great time on Thursday night when I wandered the third floor while mom, @ErintheCat1 and @ChirpyCats sat on the floor outside their rooms, chatting like old friends. Mom told me later that’s the best way to get to know people — by obstructing hall traffic.

Here are a few highlights from our week at Blogpaws:

Erin, me and Basil posing with our pawrents. Read More

Sherlock Herms Purranormal Mysteries One Year Anniversary!

Hi Furends! Exactly one year ago today Sherlock Herms Purranormal Mysteries made it’s debut right here on Wonderpurr.com.

Choosing May 22nd wasn’t by chance. Did you know today is also International Sherlock Holmes Day? And that day was chosen because it’s the birthday of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, the creator of the most wonderpurr detective on earth…except for Sam Spade, but this isn’t Sam Spade Day.

Anyway, I want to thank all of you who have been with us from the start, and also all of you who are just discovering Sherlock Herms. And if you need to catch up reading our mysteries, we have all the links available in our Case Files.

Thanks again for stopping by. Happy Sherlock Herms… I mean, Sherlock Holmes Day!

A Sherlock Herms Flashback: The Case of Mrs. Shallowford’s Ghost

Previously on Sherlock Herms – The Case of Mrs. Shallowford’s Ghost Mrs Shallowford's Ghost

After watching Dori make her singing debut at The Desert Galaxy nightclub, Herman wakes up to realize he’s had a bad dream. Not that Dori’s singing was terrible, but that he was inside the almost famous detective Max Shallowford’s body, and the mobster Sammy ‘The Squid’ Calamari was expecting him to shoot another mobster.

Upon waking, Herman finds himself back in his attic office seventy years in the past. And seated across from him is Charley Feeble, a ghost. Charley tells him he is the real Max Shallowford, but has a pathological form of shyness. Because he feared meeting his clients in person, he hired an out of work actor from Ecum Secum, Nova Scotia to pretend to be Max Shallowford.

The actor was really good. Too good. He fooled everyone, including Charley, by taking over and getting involved with the mob. That landed him in trouble and he ended up disappearing, along with the mobster’s money and his girlfriend. The Squid was more upset about the money than the girlfriend.

The actor also married a showgirl by the name of Vivian who was responsible for scaring Charley to death. He tells Herman, “I called you, Sherlock Herms, to retrieve the missing jewelry so Vivian will stop screaming. She still frightens me, even though I’m dead. However, I now realize that if I can get her to step outside of my house, I may have a way to prevent her from reentering. That’s why I needed you, Herman. I need you to help me get rid of Vivian Shallowford.”

And now…The Conclusion.

SHERLOCK HERMS DIVIDER

Read More

Stories from The Whiner: Monkey Toss

Welcome to a new series on Wonderpurr.com called Stories from The Whiner.

Hi, it’s me. Dori. *wavy paws* As I didn’t make my debut into The Wonderpurr Gang until a couple years ago, I wasn’t a part of the Whiner stories. I thought seriously about suing…but then Hwermie suggested I host this series. I may still sue…but until I can scrape together more than two huge quarters to hire a lawyer (think they cost four huge quarters) I’m stuck doing this gig.

Today’s episode features Buddy, the most wonderpurr tabby that ever graced Mom’s life–except for me!

Diagnosed with diabetes at age 10, he lived to be 22. He traveled everywhere with my parents cuz he needed insulin shots, but that didn’t slow him down. In fact, here’s a photo of me and Buddy taken shortly after I joined the family:

Awww, I was so pwecious!

Anyway! In this episode, a much younger Buddy–about age 8, teaches my Mom about having fun with things you find lying around the house. And now…Monkey Toss! Read More

Dori’s Command Performance: Purrple Underpants

Let me entertain mew…. Let me make you smile.

Hi everyone, it’s me Dori! *wavy paws* I’ve been mobbed with requests to sing my hit song, Purrple Underpants for those who have never heard the song before. So, without further delay…

Herman @TattleCat’s #Blogpaws Diary Day Two

Hi Pals! Thanks so much for reading my Day One diary. I wanted to post something yesterday, but then Mom got her back in trouble and we kinda unraveled from there.

We had a long drive on Monday, so we stayed at a hotel in Augusta. Then on Tuesday it was supposed to be an easy-peasy four hour drive…except we got caught in some awful road construction, and then wackiness ensued when we decided to take the back roads and since we didn’t have a paper map, just GPS, we had to drive way out of range cuz the GPS kept steering us back to the backed up highway. So we struggled to get to Myrtle Beach for most of the day. When we finally arrived it was around 4pm, and Mom and Dad were hot and sweatty.

But not me! Here’s a what we did on Tuesday and also on Wednesday.

On Wednesday, while I slept in, Mom and Dad got together for breakfast with @BionicBasil’s mom, Cathrine, and her mom, Jane, and @ErintheCat1’s dad, Mark. They must have been really hungry cuz they were there all morning. Then Mom went to get her back problem adjusted cuz she was a hurtin’ puppy.

Later Cathrine and Jane came to meet me, and they all went out to a place called BrookGreen Gardens for the day. I guess they like to sweat and look at giant statues and trees and stuff.

This is the statue of Pegasus. It took my pawrents a long time to find it, so they stood around looking at it for awhile before leaving.

While they were out looking at trees and statues and stuff, I was back at the hotel working on my tan lines.

Tomorrow is Thursday and that’s when Blogpaws really starts. I will try to take pictures so you can see what’s going on. Until tomorrow!

Have a Wonderpurr Day!

Herman!!!

Herman @TattleCat’s #Blogpaws Diary Day One

Hi Everyone! It’s Day One of Blogpaws week.

Wonderpurr.com is a Finalist for Best Pet Humor Blog, so naturally I am very excited to be attending this year’s conference in Myrtle Beach. I’ve had friends who aren’t able to attend ask me to keep them posted, so I thought I’d write a diary.

My fur sibs were under the impression that this was an ordindary Monday just like all the other Mondays…until Mom and Dad started pushing stuff out the front door to pack the van. I, of course, supervised. I felt kinda bad for Dori, as she doesn’t like car rides to the vet, and when she saw the pink carrier come out, she disappeared under something and didn’t come out to say Goodbye to Mom and wish me luck on the Nose-to-Nose Award.

I really had hoped Dori would come with me to Blogpaws this year so I could show off my little sister…I’m so proud of her! Plus she’s very pretty. But Mom says Dori needs to learn not to be afraid of cars before she can go to Blogpaws. Good luck with that happening.

Before we could leave, Dad had to clean litter boxes and do a final check on stuff while Mom fed the Wonderpurr Gang and the soon-to-be mommy raccoons that hang out in our yard…like, all the time cuz why wouldn’t they when food is practically served on a silver platter… Read More

Mockingbird Mother’s Day

 My fenced yard has been chosen by a new mother mockingbird to teach her babies how to survive. That she has chosen a yard where many cats live astounds me.

The other day the baby sat on the fence waiting for direction from his mom. It was near twilight. Clearly the baby bird knew it was supposed to do something but mom wasn’t nearby. The reason: Peaches was perched at the far end of the same fence and had noticed him.

We watched with astonishment as Peaches slowly walked the top of the fence toward the baby. He didn’t fly off to safety, rather sat obediently where his mom had left him. The closer Peaches got the more we feared for the baby mockingbird.

When it became apparent the baby was going to become a trophy kill, Peaches was plucked off the fence and hustled indoors. That’s when the mother mockingbird returned.

This morning the young mother has two babies learning to survive in our yard. They hop along the fence. They fly to the neighbors roof then back to land on a fragile bush not designed to hold the weight of a bird. When the bush limb bounces, the fledgling flaps it’s wings to keep from falling. Nearby, Mom watches with patience. She has a big job ahead of her.

Her Mother’s Day won’t be rewarded with flowers or candy or jewelry or a nice card. No. Her reward will be in the survival of her babies. Their rapid maturity to understand survival.

Her reward will be raising her babies to survive so that they too will live to raise their own babies.

Happy Mother’s Day!

Sherlock Herms Has Gone to #Blogpaws

“Digital EMF Meter… Check! 35mm camera… Check! Digital thermometer and Spirit Box… Check! Litter box, extra litter and pooper scooper… Check!”

“Hwermie! What are yoo doing?”

I glanced up from packing my suitcase to see my little sister Dori looking at me with huge worried eyes. “I’m leaving for Blogpaws next week. There’s a lot to do before we head out.”

She looked ready to cry. “But Hwermie! Dottie is weady to go through the doggy door portal. She needs to know she’s dead. Yoo can’t just zoom off to Blogpaws and leave her there. What if she fweaks out?”

I sighed. “Look, I meant to help her figure out she’s dead before I left for Blogpaws. But then Mom got a lecture gig at some writer’s conference and also a gig with a radio talk show over in Spain of all places. I kinda need her assistance to help Dottie with her issues. It’s not my fault we ran out of time. I was here at home doing my part as a purranormal investigator. If you have to be upset with anyone, be upset with Mom.”

Dori wrung her tabby tail with nervous paws. “Should I spray something?”

“NO! I… Look, honey. I’m sorry we can’t help Dottie this week. Or even next week… I–”

“Two whole weeks! That’s a lifetime in cat years!”

*pulls out pocket calendar* Actually, I can’t schedule Dottie’s problem until June 9th.”

I saw Dori stagger. “I think I’m gonna pass out,” she moaned, making me run to ease her to the floor. “We worked so hawd to get weaders to like us. Now they’re all gonna go away and never come back.”

“No, they won’t abandon us. They’ll be back.”

Dori began to sob. “Our readers might have Atten-Shun Deffy-Sit Dis-Odor. We need to post every week so they don’t fo’get us, Hwermie!” She flexed her claws. “If only I was born with fingers so I could type instead of being born with an amazingly beautiful face. Oh! The twials and twibulations of being born gorjus!” Read More

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