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Wonderpurr Garage Band Music
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Sherlock Herms Master Detective – Part 8
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Kringle Chapter 9 Part 5
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Kringle Chapter 9 Part 4
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Kringle Chapter 9 Part 3
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Kringle Chapter 9 Part 2
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Sherlock Herms Master Detective – Part 7
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Kringle Chapter 9 Part 1
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Kringle Chapter 8 Part 3
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A Wonderpurr Supawstars Spotlight Award

Wonderpurr Garage Band Music

I have the World’s Greatest Pet Sitter and when she mentions a change, I jump on it right away. So when she told me she thought Jesse, Nikolas and Chevy, whom she calls the Garage Band, needed music to fill the silence, I went looking for a radio.

No one carries radios anymore. Seriously, I went everywhere and found nothing. I even made the mistake of revealing my age when I asked someone if they carried transistor radios. He looked at me like I’d asked if they carried plutonium. I didn’t want to spend a lot. The Garage Band mostly sleeps when I’m out of town, and ordering on line didn’t appeal to me.

But! Just when I thought Michelle would have to hum Sound of Silence while feeding them, I found my Dad’s old stereo. He passed in 2009 and it ended up in a closet, unplayed for 8 years. Plus the speakers were missing. But after I dusted it off and I plugged a pair of computer speakers into the earphone slot, music poured out.

Right now my cats are listening to NPR. A classical symphony is playing. Michelle suggested Classic Rock, but I don’t think the boys would appreciate Steppenwolf, Steely Dan or The Who.

 

Sherlock Herms Master Detective – Part 8

When Mosey had that fight with Fergus and zoomed without me back to the future, he’d broken our connection, inadvertently erasing my presence in 2017. Like I’d never existed! But me and my mom have a soulmate connection and she’d found me. She’d appeared to me looking like a red laser light, and said Jack and Opie were busy working to reconnect me to Mosey. But until they did… I would remain in 1894.

In order to distract me from totally fweaking out, I’d asked Fergus to teach me how to solve cases like Doyle wrote for Sherlock Holmes. Fergus was a Bedlington Whippet cross. He’s also the real brains behind the Sherlock Holmes detective mysteries. (I know, I’m as shocked as you that my hero is a legend of fiction and not a living breathing detective).

I didn’t know if I had the attention span, much less the desire to learn about the detective biz, but I was despurrrate to keep my mind busy on something other than the fact that I might never see my Mom or Dori ever again.

“A detective of Sherlock Holmes’ caliber continuously analyzes the details and looks for clues to possible solutions,” Fergus told me. “When Holmes goes about the business of searching for clues, he treats them like a puzzle with a missing piece, going to great lengths to find that missing piece so he can then move on to the next level of success.”

“Sounds complicated.”

“Not at all. I can break it down into simple steps for you.”

We moved to Doyle’s office with the door closed so Mrs. Gray wouldn’t disturb us while Fergus recited the “simple” steps Doyle used to make Sherlock Holmes a Master Detective.

“Pay attention to the details, especially what might first appear to be insignificant,” Fergus was saying. “When you begin a case, start with the basics of what you already know to be certain, without question or exaggeration. Be alert when you’re talking to someone, yet behave in a passive manner so as not to influence the subject into elaboration.”

I know this was important stuff he was telling me, but his flat, Ben Stein-like monotone made it hard for me to keep my eyes open. Clearly he found it as boring to say as it was for me to hear. Read More

Kringle Chapter 9 Part 5

With Christmas fast approaching, I thought why not ease you all into the spirit of the holiday with ten chapters from my novel, KRINGLE. Yes! Ten free chapters for you to enjoy running Monday through Thursday until November 16th. Hope you enjoy!

To catch up on the story I’ve added the Links to the end of this post.

~*~

Outside the Reindeer Complex Kris adjusted his knapsack and nodded to the police guarding against unauthorized personnel. They had not stopped Santa Claus and his monkey. Perhaps they should have. At Dancer’s suite a Do Not Disturb sign had been posted. She’d had a rough night. “It’s about to get rougher,” Joost predicted.

Kris stashed the knapsack in the pantry, then entered the kitchen where the tattersall windows showcased the Sulka Sika Mountains, and the pond with false rocks where he kept his candy-stash. “Any news?” he asked the technicians.

“Dr. Robinson is with Dr. Havelock. Thorne is out to lunch.”

Kris exchanged glances with Joost. “Grab lunch yourselves. I’ll be here awhile.” The techs looked uncertain, but Kris ‘Ho-Ho-Ho’d’ and the kids-at-heart left for lunch. He then returned for his knapsack, but found Yuley-the-goat chewing the straps. With him was Rudy, a white-winged Norwegian Landrace wearing a football helmet and shoulder pads.

“Coach,” the pig squealed. “Can I talk to you about Eve Delivery?”

“Not now, Rudy.” After prying Yuley from the bag, Kris hurried down the corridor with Joost clinging to his neck.

Rudy followed. “Doc Robinson said the reindeer are bad off.”

“They’ll heal in time.” Kris broke into a run. Yuley raced ahead.

“Suppose only two get better? There’s only so much time you can option before you’re sacked with a big loss. Game clock is running. Due to unsportsmanlike conduct, we’re in sudden death. Do we muff, Coach? Do we punt? Or do we take possession and free kick?” Read More

Kringle Chapter 9 Part 4

With Christmas fast approaching, I thought why not ease you all into the spirit of the holiday with ten chapters from my novel, KRINGLE. Yes! Ten free chapters for you to enjoy running Monday through Thursday until November 16th. Hope you enjoy!

To catch up on the story I’ve added the Links to the end of this post.

~*~

From inside a janitor’s closet Kris listened at the door. He had lost Nattie Blather after she had chased him from the elevator, pelting him with questions designed to provoke a reaction:

“If the reindeer die, how will you deliver toys? Rumor has it Candy’s knocked up with Brannoc’s love child. Is it true you caught Holly in bed with Brannoc?”

Nattie didn’t care what kind of reaction she got so long as she could distort it into headlines. He understood her need to print titillation in each edition. All in good fun. Usually. Then he envisioned Brannoc alone with Candy.

“I-I can’t t-talk about it,” she had wept.

“Why? Why can’t you tell me?”

“B-because it’s too horrible.

He had to find Holly. She would know what to do. He opened the closet and ran into Nattie.

“I don’t appreciate your games when I’m on deadline, Kringle. Now, answer my questions or I’ll publish whatever makes good scandal.” Read More

Kringle Chapter 9 Part 3

With Christmas fast approaching, I thought why not ease you all into the spirit of the holiday with ten chapters from my novel, KRINGLE. Yes! Ten free chapters for you to enjoy running Monday through Thursday until November 16th. Hope you enjoy!

To catch up on the story I’ve added the Links to the end of this post.

~*~

Now I understood. I was married to her brother’s drug dealer. We hugged with mutual apology. “I’m at my wit’s end, too.” I rubbed my throbbing temples. “Last night I cut Kris’s Eve route and called his relatives to help deliver toys. I made it clear, if he doesn’t change, I walk.”

“Divorce?” Val’s expression looked like she’d won the lottery.

My gaze dropped to a pink-foiled candy beside her foot. Mom had sat there yesterday. She’d dropped a Pitter Pat: a rich smooth chocolate with a blended raspberry and Belgium buttercream ganache. Oh. My. God.

“Why did you mention Cubes?” Val asked. After Petra gave her theory on how Cubes provoked the elves to attack, Val covered her face. “They were in pain. I wanted to help.”

It hit me. “Your snowflake cookies were…”

“Iced with Cubes. I didn’t know it would mess with them.”

“I think the Cubes had a psychoemotional effect on the elves,” Petra said, “which triggered a personality change. Like LSD. Hm. I wonder if they produce psychosis, and flashbacks?” Read More

Kringle Chapter 9 Part 2

With Christmas fast approaching, I thought why not ease you all into the spirit of the holiday with ten chapters from my novel, KRINGLE. Yes! Ten free chapters for you to enjoy running Monday through Thursday until November 16th. Hope you enjoy!

To catch up on the story I’ve added the Links to the end of this post.

~*~

I was in the throes of a classic migraine with arcs of light shimmering in my right eye. I bit the head off a gingerbread man. “Then what did he say?”

Petra took my decapitated cookie. “Kris came to me as a worried father, not an employer bent on destroying a valued employee.” She chose her own cookie from the Official Taste Tester plate, white rimmed with black script.

Valda knocked it from her hand. “They’re drek. You’ll barf and ruin my reputation.” Today she wore red cashmere with the requisite plunging neckline. I wondered if her dates ever looked her direct in the eye.

“They’re fine,” Petra assured.

“Fine is mediocre. You think I’m a mediocre baker?”

“No. You’re an incredible baker.”

Petra’s reassurance didn’t appease the Queen of Baked Goods. Valda turned her hostility on me. “How long do you plan to do this to me? It’s impossible to find a decent sugar sub.”

The reindeer had been poisoned. I had been assaulted by sugar-crazed elves. I wanted it gone for good. “What problems are you having, besides taste?”

She consulted her notes. “Saccharin and cyclamate cause bladder cancer in lab rats, but… What if rats are genetically prone to cancer, and it isn’t the subs at all?” Read More

Sherlock Herms Master Detective – Part 7

Previously on Sherlock Herms: The Making of a Master Detective…

 Part 1.   Part 2.   Part 3.   Part 4.  Part 5.  Part 6.

“I am happy to answer your questions, Fergus. But I traveled here to learn about being a Master Detective from Sherlock Holmes, and you said you’d share your secrets with me.”

“With your time machine gone, we have all the time in the world.”

“I don’t think so. I’m worried, but not fweaked out. I think Mosey will return for me.”

“Is fweaked out similar to being balmy on the crumpet? You Time Travelers have strange words for everything! Do they still use the heliograph in your time? Has miasma been eliminated? Tell me they still make roly-poly in the future! I do so love roly-poly.”

Closing my eyes, I placed my chin on top of my paws. Charlie! Please hear me. I need you to rescue me. I don’t want to be stuck in 1894. I can’t eat their noms. I have a delicate tummy. And I don’t want to widdle in the flower bed, or learn a whole new language!”

As sleep threaded its way through my body, Fergus’s voice faded and the shade on the inside of my eyelids went from firey-orange to torpor-black.

I found myself in a dark place with no light…cuz it was dark. I felt a soft rug under my paws, and the space wasn’t hot or cold…just right. At first I didn’t smell anything, but then something familiar found its way into my nose and I breathed in deep.

“Charlie?” I whispurred. “Is that you?”

The smell grew stronger. I took comfort from its familiarity. Then I saw a tiny red light in the darkness, hurling toward me. And when it arrived it was still no bigger than a pin point laser, darting back and forth in an enticing way that made me want to spring from my crouch to catch it.

“Herman? Oh, Herman! I’m so relieved I’ve found you.”

“Mom? Mom! Is that you?”

“It’s me, Monkey Boy! I’ve been worried sick ever since Mosey returned without you.”

“I want to come home. Tell Mosey to come get me.”

The red dot settled on top of my left paw. “First, tell me how you got separated.”

“Mosey got into a fight with Fergus, this dog who lives with a guy named Doyle. Did you know Sherlock Holmes is a fictional character in a book? I’m still in shock. I—”

“Herman! Focus! This is important. Charlie tried to come, but you went back in time before he was born and he’s unable to reach you. It is my love for you that has made this communication possible. But I don’t know how long I have. I need to know what happened.” Read More

Kringle Chapter 9 Part 1

With Christmas fast approaching, I thought why not ease you all into the spirit of the holiday with ten chapters from my novel, KRINGLE. Yes! Ten free chapters for you to enjoy running Monday through Thursday until November 16th. Hope you enjoy!

To catch up on the story I’ve added the Links to the end of this post.

~*~

Accompanied by Joost’s big beat style drumming, Kris careened off walls and people as he stormed the East Wing corridor. Whatever Valda put in the figgy pudding had opened his eyes to the world and its ugly deceptions. Holly’s cutesy pocket note was the final straw. He wanted his Smooch back and he would get it, or there would be heck to pay.

A squeal broke his manic rant. Realizing he’d knocked the Décor & More committee’s head designer off her ladder, he caught her with profuse apologies.

“What do you think of my tribute to Brazil’s rainforest?” Jessica gestured to the sixty-foot kapok trees, waterfall, exotic ferns and thousands of butterflies.

Kris looked into the leafy canopy. A dozen capuchin monkeys gazed back. “What’s with everyone wanting monkeys? They’re worse than cats.” Joost nodded from his shoulder. Kris noticed one monkey gnawed on a bright yellow frog. “You brought in frogs?”

Jessica opened a box of assorted colors. “Just a few. For drama.”

The frog-eating monkey fell dead at her feet. Jessica screamed. Kris confiscated the box. “Drama we don’t need.” His stomach gurgled. Tasting sour metal, he hoped the figgy pudding wasn’t life-threatening. He didn’t have time to be sick, much less dead. Read More

Kringle Chapter 8 Part 3

With Christmas fast approaching, I thought why not ease you all into the spirit of the holiday with ten chapters from my novel, KRINGLE. Yes! Ten free chapters for you to enjoy running Monday through Thursday until November 16th. Hope you enjoy!

To catch up on the story I’ve added the Links to the end of this post.

~*~

“You’ve ruined PolarCap. You’ve killed Linders’ business.”

“If Santa didn’t marry you, you’d be nobody. You’d be a worker bee like us.”

“Even the Tattle wouldn’t hire you, you daughter of a troll.”

I had never been struck in my life, not even a childhood spanking. Humiliation warred with outrage. Had Polartown gone mad?

“Kringle Enterprises is doomed because of you.”

“Polartown is doomed.”

“Christmas is doomed.”

As someone screamed, Brannoc roared, “Have you lost your minds?” He knocked the elves aside, picked me up, and carried me to his office where I saw Dova in tears. It had been she who screamed. Read More

A Wonderpurr Supawstars Spotlight Award

What a Wonderpurr surprise! Miz Elise and Avery at KittyClysm awarded us with their Supawstars Spotlight Award. It is always an honor to have our work recognized, especially by those we admire. This award kinda makes me dressing up like a fweakin peacock worthwhile…almost.

Thank you so much KittyClysm. You’ve made our day!

Miz Elise wrote:

You can tell from the title of this blog it’s wonderful, can’t you? I wish I had more time this past month to stop by and browse through cat blogs I love because I would’ve commented on so many of Kim’s wonderful cat stories. She is an amazing storyteller, but honestly, I think she deserves an award for her pet photography alone! It’s all about those perfect moments she manages to capture on her camera. I mean look at this cute grumpiness – how the heck did she shoot those pictures so perfectly? And this perfection is not just a one off folks! She delivers on the crazy perfect pictures pretty much every time. Wonderpurr blogging right there, from start to finish!

Click to read post that won his award by KittyClysm

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