Grumpy Cat

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Valentine’s Day Advice by Adorapurr

Valentine’s Day Advice by Adorapurr

Hi Everyone. It’s me, Dori. *wavy paws!* Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day, and I’m here to tell you, Valentine’s Day is all about Womance.

Womancing your hoomon, that is.

When your hoomon feels loved and appweciated, he or she rewards you with belly rubs, ear scritches and extra tweats, like my most favorite tweats in the world, Smittens.

Not that I’m saying you should womance your hoomon because you want something in return…

No wait. That is what I’m saying.

Anyway! Womance is a balancing act of Action and Gift-giving.

Actions speak louder than words. For example…spraying her coat will have her thinking of you for a long, long time.

Serenade him. Sing the song of your people at dawn. Get a fursib to accompany you. Make beautiful mewsic together!

Drape yourself over her lap while she’s eating noms and watching TV. Help her eat the noms. If she’s extra soft around the middle, sneeze all over her noms so she won’t eat them and lose extra softness. She will thank you.

If he’s dressed up to go out to dinner, rub extra hard around his legs. Be sure to distribute your fur evenly so he won’t stop thinking of you all evening. Plus the hoomon he’s with will be able to enjoy you, too.

Gifts-giving doesn’t have to be expensive. While dead mice and lizards are so last year, unless you’re Choupette Lagerfeld, Tommaso, or Tardar Sauce aka Grumpy Cat, you’re not expected to shop for your hoomon at Tiffany’s or OliveGreenDog.com  (although I highly recommend their Roach Rods and Marbled Boiled Wool Balls).

Dori’s Top Gift Suggetions for Hoomons:

Beloved old catnip mousie that you no longer want cuz it stinks.

A fat, juicy, live spider you found in the bathroom.

That lost diamond earring you hid under the sofa last year.

Help her cook dinner noms:

Or maybe she needs a mew lamp:

While it’s the thought that counts, presentation is very important. Be sure to wrap your gift in purrty red paper with hearts and a bow.

I hope some of my suggestions are helpful. And if they are, remempurr to tell everyone that it was me who thought of it first. Until next time…

Have a Wonderpurr Valentine’s Day.

I hope yoo get everything you deserve.

 

 

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