It's a Wonderpurr Life: Diary of an AssRabbit

Meet Chill Bill

Hey pals, Rabbit here. You may not know it about me, but I can be a handful, stressing out my pawrents and my older fursibs. Especially when I’m bored, which is like… all the time.

Then one day I found this strange duck sucking on the wall. He called himself Chill Bill. Said he'd come to help me calm the hekk down by providing me with unconditional love like the kind my mother gave me when I was just born. Since I’ve turned my pawrents once-peaceful home upside down by acting out, I gave Chill Bill my attention.

He didn’t ask me to talk about hating my mother because she gave me up for adoption, or my deep regrets for not achieving my dream of buying my own Black Forest Ham farm. He just sucked on the wall plug, filling the air with aromas that made me feel good. Feel loved. I told him I didn’t think anyone in my home loved me except Mom and Dadders. I admitted I was sad because my only friend Dori had a restraining order against me. I haven’t seen her in months.

Chill Bill listened, and the more he listened, the calmer I felt. Oh I haven’t undergone a personality change. I’m still an AssRabbit. Yesterday I was hell-bent on making Candy run so I could chase her, and I got put in my ZenDen for a time out. And when I was released, I discovered Chill Bill had a twin sucking on another wall plug. I sniffed him and felt the same comforting vibe I'd had with his brother.

For the rest of the day I hung out with my sibs without making them scream. And that night Chill Bill – or his twin, hard to tell cuz they look alike – joined me in my ZenDen, filling my room with invisible positivity.

My mom is a cat rescuer and most of my fursibs are seniors, so she’s determined they enjoy their golden years without stress. She was looking at me when she said that, so I guess Stress is my middle name. But Chill Bill reassured me he’s here for the long haul to help me become a friend to my fursibs, and not a foe.

My new friend Chill Bill fills me with feelings of comfort. I'm a calmer version of my usual chaos-creating self because of Chill Bill and TheraPetMD. You can quote me.

If you need to have a Chill Bill of your own, check out TheraPetMD. This isn’t a paid advertisement. I just wanted to share my success with this product. Stay chill pals.

Rabbit Receives Much-Needed Advice from Dr. Basil

Pals, Rabbit here. Yah, long time no meow, mostly cuz our momanager has allowed Dori to monopolize our family blog. Pffft! That's show biz, I guess. Anyway! I happened upon the homesite of the Bionic Basil B Team last week and saw Dr. Basil is back to giving advice.

Years ago my brother Herman consulted Dr. Basil on various topics, and was even fortunate to meet his momanager in purrson at the Blogpaws conference in Myrtle Beach. Good times, good memories. So when I was growling about feeling unappreciated, Herms recommended I unload my issues on Dr. Basil and see what resolutions he could come up with.

Boy, do I feel vindicated! Dr. Basil has a phenomenal background in understanding the feline psychic and as a result, he totally got me.

Please do yourself a favorite and click the image below, not only to read Basil's advice, but also to find our how you can get your problems resolved by the ultimate expurrrt in feline problems.

You won't regret it! Until ... well. Whenever cuz clearly everyone's darling Dori has full reign over this blog. Purrs, Rabbit.

First Day of Summer Backyard Morning Rush Hour

Dear Diary...

Today is the First Day of Summer! We are getting hit by huge storms. Last night our two huge water bowls got flooded. Dadders emptied 30 buckets so today’s storms don’t flood our Catio.

As I watched morning rush hour pass by, Cornelius Crowbird stopped to catch me up on neighborhood gossip. He saw the big white poodle, Flagler, out for a stroll with his daddy, and the Woodstocks at the end of the block got a notice from the HOA to remove that giant peace sign off their front lawn as it offends one of the neighbors. Cornelius didn't say which neighbor, for fear of retaliation. I will pass along updates if there are any.

I also got a little wurk out in atop my ball spinner thingy. I've watched Candy and Frank gently paw the ball, but... Pffft! So lame when you can sit on it and spin that sukka like I do. So much more action!

And then Barbie deer stopped by to tell me she and her sisters were moving to higher ground because the severe storms have flooded the area where they usually sleep. This is Florida and higher ground - especially a mile from the ocean where we are - is probably a slight mound of grass-covered dirt. Still, she was pretty adamant about going, so I didn't bother to argue.

Are you getting storms at your house? Storms in Florida mean the start of hurricane season. I can’t wait! Last year Hurricane Ian stole our power for a couple of days and ripped a roof panel off our Catio. Immediately giant birds started circling overhead as though they were Forest Gump looking down at us cats like we were inside a box of chocolates. Dadders made a temporary cover for the missing screen that kept us safe until the repair dudes could fix it a month later.

Hurricane Nicole showed up on one of the final days of Hurricane season in November and devastated Daytona Beach down the road from us. People lost their homes from wind and flooding. It was very scary, but at my house we breezed through it without damage or losing power.

Here's hoping Hurricane Season 2023 is lame and a big o' failure.

And that's my report for today. Purrs, Rabbit

Diary of an AssRabbit - Regretful Monday

Anybuddy else having a Regretful Monday? Thinking that homegrown catnip I got off of Misty at @Misty.s_World was a bit more potent than I'm used to. Probably her Appalachian Mountain air adds a THC-ish kick we don't get here in Florida.

All I'm saying is... I'd rather regret the things I've done than regret the things I haven't done. Amirite?

PeeEss - bet you checked @ShiteyKitteh's IG didn't you?

Top 10 Irish Insults

Today everyone's favorite AssRabbit is embracing his Turkish-Irish roots with his Top 10 Irish Insults. Of course... what else would you expect from an AssRabbit?

Click the photo to visit Rabbit's on-line diary blog - Diary of an AssRabbit.

And if you are Irish... brace yourself.